This is the second weekly(ish) installment in the Funny Money series of posts. Money should never be taken too seriously, and neither should this series.
Your Credit Card Debt is Too High If...
1. Your name repeatedly comes up as a potential beneficiary in a U.N. discussion titled "Debt Relief for Developing Nations".
2. Your credit score is lower than your IQ
3. You accidentally walk into a Capital One shareholders meeting where you are received with a standing ovation, following which the crowd spontaneously erupts into the song "for he's a jolly good fellow..."
4. You recently tried to board a South-West flight with your credit card statement, but the flight attendant made you pay for an extra seat (using your credit card, of course).
5. Last night you woke up to a voice yelling: "feed me Seymour", coming from your wallet. You swear it was a dream, but in the morning you look a little pale and have strange pin-prick marks on your thumb and middle finger.
6. On rainy days there is a homeless person named Eugene who uses your credit card statement as temporary shelter.
7. Small birds that stray too close to your credit card statement are silently sucked into what is described by modern physics as a hole in space-time.
8. You practice writing teeny-tiny numbers so that you can fit your minimum payment amount onto one check.
9. Yeah, you've heard of the national debt. It doesn't sound THAT big.
10. You carry a balance on your credit card. Seriously, some people actually do that.
11. Suggested by Silverbax of Hard Working Cash - "The amount of paper used to print your credit card statement causes Greenpeace to demonstrate outside of your home."
Have any other good ones? Post a comment. If you are a blogger, I will post a link to your blog if you leave a suggestion. How's that for a deal?
Liked this post? You might also enjoy this one: It's Time to Drop Your Financial Advisor When...
2 comments:
- The CEO of your credit card company calls you regularly to make sure your health is good...wouldn’t want anything to happen to you!
- Visa employees write you personal letters of thanks for helping put their kids through college.
- The amount of paper used to print your credit card statement causes Greenpeace to demonstrate outside of your home.
- The ‘debt clock’ in NY Times starts tracking your total instead of the national debt.
- MasterCard lists you by name as their ‘model client’ in their annual report to shareholders.
You can't fold your wallet because you have so many maxed cards in it.
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